You have no idea how i feel when i see this,

"when i left fer home,i was at my lowest,
and i couldn't hold back my tears and cried at lakeside mrt station .
so much fer acting strong in front of people,
and breaking down immediately when i'm alone ,boo me .
-___________________________-"

i can't stand it,but why am i pretending as if i'm alright with it ?
patience really is bigger than the ocean.

oh and cohen,thanks fer making me feel a little better just now , ^^" - Her

I seriously think Seth's would so much be a better boyfriend than I can be.
I know that something's affecting you but..guess what.. I always thought that you were fine and it was all part of my own thinking that you aren't alright.

I would say that I'm fucking pissed , yet disappointed and feeling veryy useless.

This is what's in my mind right now.

1) Why did I not force you to tell me what's happening.
2) Why can't i just move away if I know that I'm not the one.
3) Why is it that, I always get to know you only after things happens.
4) Should I just give up?
5) What's gonna happen in the future.

Well... After a good chat with the guys, let me tell you the answer.

1) Because I don't want to be over-controlling and I thought that you'll tell me everything as promised.

2) I don't know how to move away, even though I know that Seth will be there.

3) Because.. that's where you open up to me "indirectly" ?

4) I wouldn't unless You ask me to, or unless I know that Seth's really good for you.

5) I totally have no idea. Bliss i hope?

Call me a jealous bastard for all you want.
Cause yes I am jealous, but not because you hangout with your clique of guys.
But jealous of Seth's capability to be able to know what's happening around you and being able to console you.
While your GodDamn Idiotic Useless son-of-a-bitch boyfriend is just lepak-ing around with the guys.

No matter what I still don't believe in forcing out the truth.
Tell me when you want to.
I can't care less anymore.
After all, Like what you said.. "Fuck life"

I'm really tired right now, and I don't want to think anymore.
Maybe it really does work?
Not thinking and make decisions will just help you to lead a simple life.
Did you regret cranking your head and made a decision on the 14th of Febuary '09?

Well, I don't.
Cause I Love You that damn much.

goodnight.

Labels: just another lousy day