so luckily i didn't fall asleep at home just now,
managed to reach bbdc on time for my prac.
guess wad? i jumped from 1.01 to 1.03. hahahaha! POWER RIGHT?
( i know it's quite normal, just make me happy can? )

so yeah, tmro gonna spend the whole day at bbdc too. i've got 3 theory lessons tmro. so damn gonna sleep sia.

anyway, im missing you real badly if you're reading this.
please text me or something alright? I still wanna get this going. but i think it's hard..
like what you left on the caption.. "no you don't know honey"

yeah.. i really don't know and i really want to know.

the key is still on my finger when i go out and our pictures are still in my computer under the folder "Bucuk and I <3". and in my locker and in my room and in my phone and.. the image of you is still kept deep in my heart.

hais.. just hoping that things will become straight again soon. i still want to taste the cooking and the twins.

oh damn, im starting it again.

update soon.. i hope. bye.

Damn! I'm late for my BTL 1.02 alr. =((

Am supposed to wake up at 8am,
Well i did.

Wasn't suppose to go back to sleep,
Well i did that too. -_-.

GAH! wasted my SGD$8.03. hahahaha. luckily prac is at 4pm wont forget. hahaha

Now im awake in the morning with NOTHING to do. and I'm super bored.

SOMEONE KILL ME PLEASE!!

So yeah, i think Seth's really just an excuse for me i suppose.

i'm not only blaming you for this failure but im blaming myself even more for committing a stupid mistake and making you angry and this.
Yes I may portray myself to have that much patience at times but everytime when relationship matters comes it's just hard to have that much patience because i don't even know if you want to continue the relationship when all you answer me is "i don't know"

Yes it's true that i still love you and i do want to continue this but it's just hard when everything is unknown to you.

So how? may i know? if you really do want to continue this..
Just make yourself think hard for this once if you want to continue this..
no more "i dont know", please? =(

ooh and i'm not trying to be sarcastic here, but yeah. it's hard to find a guy with that much patience and the determination to actuall'y throw away his ego for a relationship. Im not trying to self promote or wad. but I'm really willing to change for you. Loves.

After 4days of torment to my heart and mind.
Finally everything's over.
Altho much hurt was inflicted to myself, but i just had to do it.
It ain't the same anymore.

You aren't the only one who lost all your trust.
I lost my trust in you to even continue this relationship.
Your indecisiveness is just terrible.
Yes, you might say that you're indecisive from the start,
but i didn't it to be this bad till an extend that you don't even know whether you still want to continue this relationship?
This is just bad..
Way too bad..

Anyway, breaking up might not be a sad thing for you since you've still got people who "loves" you so damn much.
but for me, it's like i fell from the World Trade Centre on 911.
You just won't understand how i feel, and you never will.
why?
You're simply too selfish.
Simply claiming that you don't care bout what others say or do to you anymore.
In fact, come to think of it.
It's such a defensive sentence.
Now i realise how dumb am i to actually realise this after a while.

I wouldn't bear the risk to wait for you for that "while/longer"
It's just a plain waste of time since trust isn't there anymore.

Besides i realised that i changed quite a bit of old habits within this 1 month 12 days, 8hrs and 15mins. (It's 01:09am now)
It's a good start for someone else i guess? hahaha.

meanwhile, I don't mean any offence to say all these to you.
Just hope you'll learn from your mistakes and i'll learn from mine. =))

oh oh! and..Seth, If you're reading this..
Take care of her alright? I believe that both of you really do belong together.
I was here under the arrangement of god to test your love for her. ( I think so, Just making myself feel better i guess ) hah!

so yeah, much blessings from me.
you won't even hear from me anymore.
cause i doubt she would contact me anymore either.

Gotta go now!
Takings!

Labels: fourteen febuary four fifty three pm

so yeah, called bby last night and got to talk to her.

was really happy that she allowed me to do that and at least she was able to talk to me.
Although she gave me the cold shoulders but still I didn't really bother because I deserved it and i couldn't be more happy as long as she's willing to talk to me uh.

Am like really bored in camp right now.. and I'm missing you. (are you?)
I can't forget the day we officially got together.
The places we went,
The food we ate,
The drinks we drank and also the ring that we still wear now.

oh damn, i'm falling oh so deep for you and i really regretted being a dumbass.

All i can do now is to pray for things to get better soon, cos i really really want to meet you and hug you and kiss you and most importantly to make an apology to you face to face.

alright, gotta go.
Detail starting alr.
Do take care,
Hope you'll call me if anything happens.

I love you.

A beautiful yacht fully filled with Love.
Just me and you and the sea.

All of a sudden, just a blink of an eye.
A sudden thunderstorm appeared in front of my eye.
Just in a min, our yacht got wrecked and we got separated.

Drifting apart and your shape becomes smaller and smaller.
but still, in my heart,
I'm holding you tightly as we float around in this vast ocean filled with Sorrow,
Fear,
Anger,
Disappointment, etc.

Surviving on nothing but love.

"i am giving love some space fer a while" - Her

I am thinking 2 things right now.

1. You're fucking pissed with me and that you don't want to continue this.

2. You're fucking pissed with me but you just want me to stay out of your life for a while and get back to me later?

Thought number 2 might be good news for me because at least i know that you still want to continue this.

but yet.. Thought number 1 just keeps on going through my head. Fuck am I pessimistic. Boo me. =(

I know I've made a grave mistake and I've brought even more shame to your name than what "she" did.
But don't i even deserve a second chance?

I really have no idea what to do, I have been trying very hard not to think bout' anything.
but my mind is just filled with images of you. and the things you've been posting.

How much more suicidal can one get? - Dixon.
Very. - P
Okay thanks - Dixon.

<3 Miraajoy.

Day 1 without you.

Everything just seems so messed up without Bby texting me or even not being able to hear her voice for just that few seconds. I realise that I really can't do without you and that I really hope to hear from you soon.

I guess you might be reading this so i just wanna tell you,
You slept real late and you had very sleep today.
Please try to sleep more later alright? I doubt I'll be hearing from you today but i still hope so.
You should be having dinner now and that's a good sign.
I lost all euphoric emotions within that 1min phone call and i really regretted it.

Call it Karma , but i still think that if we can work things out.
Karma will actually look at us and think to him/herself;
"These kids are trying very hard to change, why not just give them a chance"

I know I'm just blabbering nonsense but I still believe that we can do anything together as long as we're one.

I love you Mira,

-OinkyBbyBucuk2Sygsygsyg. <3

"i truly have no heart to continue this," - Her

I know I've always been the one that made everything turn sour and I'm really sorry,
I really don't know how can i make things better perhaps just by shutting up and not thinking bout anything will just maintain things the way both of us wants it to be.

I've been reading a particular text from you that says "When we get married then I'll cook for you kay? =D Love you!" over and over again. I really want this moment to come and I don mean tasting your cooking but to get married with you and have the most adorable twins on earth.

Remember you said that all these things this girl said bout you and the way she's belittling you is your retribution for the wrong-doings that you've done so far?

Well i think, Our current issue is my retribution for what wrongs that I've done in the past. And.. I'm really beginning to think that whatever bad things that are coming my way are my retributions. Thanks for enlightening me. I should just face things calmly and softly from now onwards and I'll make sure it happens.

Once again I'm sorry for what I've done. and don't give up on this can? please..

After a loooong talk with a friend, then did i realise that what I've been doing for her is so so wrong. I guess Im just not used to being in love and I still don't know how to do things properly.

Give me a while alright? I promise everything will change to how you want it. Sorry and Loves.

I just cant wait to squeeze you tight the moment i see you,
Oh i miss you oh so much.
faster 4pm.. please? =))
A real state of Euphoria. Gah!

60 things most girls dont know

Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them!
(oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 6 guys..you're a HOE)

--"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

--Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

--Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

--Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

--Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him.

--Guys hate it when their girlfriend get's too close with guys who are interested in her, and it's worse if the girl knows it but yet ignore the facts.

--Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method.

--A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.

--Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved.

--Don't talk about your guy friends to your boyfriend.

--Guys get jealous easily.

--Guys are more emotional than they'd like people to think.

--Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.

--Guys are good flatterers when courting but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like.

--Guys hate asking parents for money to buy girls presents. So they come up with ideas like saving their lunch money for a week. But it never works because guys are always hungry so they end up asking the parents for money anyway.

--Girls are guys' weaknesses.

--Guys are very open about themselves.

--It's good to test a guy first before you trust him. But don't let him wait too long.

--Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you may end up being admired by your boyfriend.

--If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.

--A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.

--Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships.

--Guys will brag about anything.

--Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. We rarely use beautiful.If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot.

--No matter how much guys talk about asses and boobs, personality is key.

--Guys learn from experience not from the romance books that girls read and take as their basis of experience.

--Guys worry about the thin line between being compassionate and being whipped.

--Guys think WAY too much. One small thing a girl does, even if she doesn't notice it can make the guy think about it for hours, trying to figure out what it meant.

--Guys seek for advice from girls not other guys. Because most guys think alike, so if one guy's confused, then we're all confused.

--Any guy could write out a rulebook or advice book for flirting, but no guy can write out a book about relationships.

--Try to be as straightforward as possible.

--If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.


--If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and is spazzing inside.

--When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is. Guys rarely say that.

--When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me."

--Guys don't really have final decisions.

--If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.

--If your best guy friend seems to avoid you or is never around when you're with your boyfriend, he's probably jealous and likes you.

--When a guy tells you that you are beautiful, don't say you aren't. It makes them want to stop telling you because they don't want you to disagree with them.

--When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking something.

--Guys like femininity not feebleness.

--Guys don't like girls who punch harder than they do.

--A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes.

--Don't be a snob. Guys can be intimidated and give up easily.

--Everything in moderation. Put on makeup, wear perfume. Just not too much.

--Guys talk about girls more than girls talk about guys.

--Guys hate rejection, but they hate being led on even more.

--If you are going to reject a guy, just do it. Don't say they are like a brother or just good friends, it just hurts even more. Tell them that you aren't interested in a relationship and they will respect you.

--Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing but somehow are drawn even more to them.

--A guy would give his left nut to be able to read a girl's mind for a day.

--No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He's just too stubborn to admit it.

--Not all guys are assholes. Just because ONE is a jackass doesnt mean he represents ALL of us.

--We don't like girls who are too skinny.

--We love it when girls talk about there boobs.

--Always make sure you know what kind of stuff your getting into before making out with a guy ...like wheather it's a one time deal or not ....

--Believe it or not shy guys are the most easiest to talk to..it may not seem right but trust me they will start opening up like books after you just ask them questions about their lives and unoticable tell them about yours...

--When a guy hits your butt it means that he wants you sexually

--Even if they refuse it all guys are ticklish on the ribs..

--Guys love neck rubs and if he lets you keep doing it ..it means that he really likes you or his neck really hurts...

--Guys will test the waters to see how far they can get with you. Even if he doesn't intend to it will happen. Know how far it is you want to let him go and he will respect that...after you let him know a couple times.

--When a guy sacrifices his sleep and health just to be with you, he really likes you and wants to be with you as much as possible.

woke up at 11am, and yes I'm sick.
went back to sleep and woke up at 5.
went back to sleep AGAIN!
and woke up at 7:30. hahaha. damn i feel so oinked.
must be your influence. =))

so yeah, really nothing much at all for today.
Sleep...sleep sleep sleep and sleeeeeep!
and yeah, sorry bucuk for not being able to meet you. =(
will make it up to you tmro alright? *hint hint*
haahha, no laa. don think so far k?

i was reading my cousin's blog just now and he had this quote and here it goes..
"The best and most beautiful things in life cannot be seen,not touched but are felt in the heart"
Hellen Keller, 1880 - 1968

Everytime i see this quote i tend to think of grandpa, and tell myself that why am i so stupid to not cherish him when he is still around. and only when he's gone then did i realise that i love him and that i still got loads of things that i wanna tell him, show him and even prove to him.

After grandpa's lesson, I'm learning to cherish things nowadays.
this includes Mummy,Daddy
Korkor,Sis-in-law
My friends.
and Definitely my Sexy Wifey;

so..I've decided to go take up my motor license soon after being psycho-ed by apit! hahaha
i mean.. it's like wad..five hundred bucks to get the license. and maybe save another two thousand to take out the bike and insurance and road tax. hmmm.. Very good idea. hahaha

gonna go talk to mummy and daddy now about it. wahahaha! pray hard!

Labels: cherish or regret

Sorry for the late update.

So, was busy settling grandpa's funeral and wasn't really at home everyday as I stayed over at the Wake everynight to look after the place.
Thanks to Bby and friends for helping me kill time over there. Appreciated much. =))

Today was the funeral of grandpa, i didn't really had much sleep so went to the funeral in a really down and tired mood. Proceeded to Church of Mary of the Angels at 11am for Mass. and I'm really impressed that the church is super super nice. It has a really really big sculpture of Christ in the centre of the Service hall. but still.. I ain't into christianity and stuff. which also means that I was really bored at the service but yet had to maintain my cool. The priest did a really good job of helping to keep me awake by asking everyone to sit and stand and sit and stand for the prayers. hahaha i guess?.

after the Mass we went off to Mandai Crematorium, a place where I so damn don love to go. Did another small praying session and went to take a last look at grandpa. It was eff-ing devastating. no matter how much i can laugh for the past 3days, it all ended up in tears within that few seconds. My last image of grandpa, a really deep and nice image.

then came the worst, everyone proceeded to the viewing hall and waited for the coffin to slowly proceed to the cremation place. once the coffin became visible, papa cried and cried and kept on shouting his last words to grandpa. I've never see papa so sad before, it was really heart wrecking and eventually everyone including me and korkor broke out too.

While crying, I suddenly felt that gush of guilt go into my head and flashbacks start to recollect in my brain and i see images of grandpa's last day alive. I went down on my knees and apologised to him as many times as i could but i know that, no matter how many times i were to apologise, it wont make any difference either. I guess i just did it to deceive myself for that few mins uh.

Now everything is over , Grandpa's no longer around and Tmro's gonna be a start of a brand new day. Back to my Usual lifestyle again. Just hope that everything won't change.

Anyway, I would really like to thank all my friends who came down to the wake.
I really appreciate all the troubles you guys took to come down and accompany me. =))

most importantly, to my dearest sexy wifey.
Thank you for being with me at my lowest, i really needed that.
It was fun being with you for the past 2 nights and I will never forget every moment spend with you. Weird huh. ( don laugh, it's serious ) =D.
and yeah, korkor, sis-in-law and cousins likes you and said that you look like a very nice girl.
well of course i said "That's so not true" hehs! no laa, i said "Of course laa, look who's the delicious hubby." wahahaha! Torque. =x
I love you Bucuk2Sygsygsyg! ! ! ! !


-Oinkybby

stayed up all the way till 3pm and went off to brother's engagement preparation.
it was all sunny and dry till bout 3.30 and it started raining super heavily, and i really mean super.
Trees fell and hit cars,
dustbins FLYING around.
It's like im in a typhoon.

luckily everything went well in the end,
meanwhile korkor and sis-in-law had their ceremony i was sitting alone and crying to myself.
Why cant grandpa just wait for just 1 more day to be the witness, at least im sure that he'll be able to move on even more peacefully than now.
and soon after that, they went for the tea ceremony.
Korkor worked really hard to keep that smile going, till the moment where he had to kneel down in front of sis-in-law's grandparents to serve them tea.
That was when everybody in the room started crying.
Because grandpa was supposed to be there as well.
He was supposed to drink that cup of tea and yet, he just had to pass on.
Sad yet true. I really could see the sadness in korkor's eye.
It was really depressing.

After that went back home with mom and dad and changed our clothes.
off again, but this time to the funeral wake.
Once we reached there, mama and i went to see grandpa.
even before i can see him, i broke out alr.
i felt the biggest guilt ever in my life.
I just cant bring myself to look face to face to him, but in the end i still did.
Cos i really dont want to lose that handsome image in my mind.
He seemed really peaceful and i really hope that it is true.
I kneeled down in front of gonggong, and just started apologizing and apologizing and apologizing.
till uncle had to carry me up and put me onto the chair, cos apparently mama tried to pull me away but i resisted.. quite hardly i supposed.

The guys came down tonight to visit me and to see gonggong, really appreciate that ALOT.
Thanks guys for coming down even though you all know that mama's a racist. i really really needed that. and thank you all for cheering me up. i really feel so much better now.

And to OinkyBbyBucuk2SygSygSyg, please don be sad that you aren't able to come down.
It's not your fault at all k? and i'll be just fine. Grandma's more important at this point of time my dear. i dont want you to feel that guilt like how i'm feeling right now. okay? =))

so yeah, off to sleep man. really need some rest. damn damn long and tiring day.

takings!

Slept at 1am, woken up by mom at 3am.

and she said "dix, your granddad just passed away"
i was like "what?" and put on a strong front and consoled my mom.
" don worry laa, everything will be alright. we cant spoil korkor's( my elder brother ) big day.
Mama was like.. "yeah , i'll be fine"
and went back to her room.

I woke up ,
stared through my window,
and into the deep blue sky.
I wondered to myself and said,
Is it just a dream or..
is reality really that harsh.
I punched the wall with as much force as i have.
and just when that happened,
something slapped me real hard.
guess what,
It's reality.
I walked to the kitchen, to get a drink.
and without realising,
my cup was already full of tears.
As I feel those little droplets of sadness roll down my cheeks.
i felt a hand landed on my shoulder,
a feeling of comfort.
and it's Mama.
Mama said "Son, don't be like this. You're the one who told me to be strong. You have to be strong too yeah?"
I couldn't control my movements, i couldn't control my feelings.
and neither can i control the lost in me.
I knelt on the floor , looked into the sky.
Kow-towed 3 times and said "Sorry gonggong(grandpa) , I shouldn't have made you angry on your last day"

A mix of emotions are running through my body now, which explains the sickness.
Sadness
Fear
Guilt
but yet Happy.

All the Best to Korkor's Engagement.
and Rest in peace my beloved Grandpa.

Dixon OCY.

Today is my first month together with Monters. yay us! =D

Met her at 1 ( reached at 1.40 ) at yishun then went to Cathay.ters. Grr! oink much.
Bby didn't tell me that she's with her Mom and sis!
I was like super panic when i saw them. thanks dear.
hahahaha!
so yeah, went to cathay looked for ATM Machine.and found out that... ATM Machine got no money. grr!! guess everybody's broke huh? heh.

caught a movie, PUSHHH!!! i mean really.. it's called push.
and it was pretty good, real glad that she loved it. =D
Well, what can i say.. I'm a good decision maker. wahahaha!

after that we went to Forum Coffeebean(as usual) and lepak-ed and chatted and laughed and... laughed.. and chatted. and off to Far east for Fried Mars Balls. WOOOHOOO!! FATNESS!! =((

so yeah, was really surprised to see old faces around in town. hahaha. cooool shit.
met up with Seth and Izaki.
Handed baby over to them (sadness)
and went off to Lakeside.!

so yeah, im really at a lost of words because.. Im sick and Someone thought that Im a gangster. =(( well i cant blame him tho.

"Stare at me and you'll die!' is written on my forehead i guess. =(( sadness much.

oh well, enjoy the pictures. altho it's only a little tho. heh.

takings!

Labels: sexy wifey

Woke up just now and the first thing that came to my mind.
Continue or End. -____-
fuck you brain, of course it's Continue.
so yeah, Am meeting sygsygsyg later on at Sembawang. Time we had a talk.(really hate this part the most).

so yeah, "You and I Both" is playing for the 21 time now. foo?

anyway, was watching titanic just now. HAHAHAHA! cooool film uh.
You jump I jump. But sometimes... who know's if I'll jump and You'll jump. kn?
Cute yet really loving. enjoyyeed..

so yeah, Went down to Boat quay as stated in the previous post.
Saw soooo many old faces.
really happy to see my old friends. misss them so much. hahaha the kechoh times. =))
and just when i saw my best bud, a fight broke out at Kraven. LOL
Da biase laa ehk? hahaha.
1 on 23423452345 people? hahaha poor fellow. kena keropok at the side of the road.

so yeah.. drank 2 bottles of 3litres worth of Martell. and some beer.
trust me, my head's fucking spinning right now. hahaha. but still i wanna meet sygsygsyg. =))

trust me when i say i miss her i really do.. but yet I'm afraid to meet her. but I know that we've gotta go and settle it. *hits own head several times*

when i look at our pictures i just cant stop wondering why things have changed so much.
but instead of thinking about what you've done, i've been thinking bout what happened to me.
i realised that i became very sensitive when this relationship went deeper and deeper.
i've never felt this way before, cos i can say that i've never really fallen in love before?
i really wanna change, and i need you to be by my side to help me. i want your support.
I just can't stand the thought of losing you.

oh and p, sorry i couldnt follow you to buy presents.
go out with you soon alright.

gotta go prepare now.
Takings.

Labels: oink oink oink

so guess what. it's saturday and i went for work! woooo!

60bucks in 5hrs how cool is that. =)) and yeah im still missing oinky like loadsloads! gonna meet her tmro! yayy so looking forward to it. heh

anyway, celebrated armand and apit's birthday at pondok and here i am!

doing my so called "duty" at boat quay! hahahaha! (inside joke )

will update later i guess!

DRINK DRINK DRINK!

I miss you babylove. muah!

so yeah, loads of shit happened for the past few days. reall fucked up.

but guess what, i need some donation from anyone. i need somemore good luck.
Got myself off 6accidents in 2 days.
Heal my sickness.
Get me off Lovesick.
who know's, if i can't sleep tonight again! i'll have to face another few more accidents tmro?
hahaha. but well, no matter how fucked up life may seem to be..

I guess I'll still say that.. Life isn't that bad afterall.

Cause i realised something.
Things always gets better after a certain time.
and I'm realllyyy confident that it will. *smiles big big for Her*

missing you but yet I don't know how to face you.
argh.. i really wanna thrash things out but yet...
I can't bear to.. cause it might be the end or not, the beginning of a better start.

HOW HOW HOW! *smacks own head*

i realised that there's more Unhappy stuffs than Happy stuffs in here.
hmmm... time to change the concept.hehs.

alright gotta go out again! *hits her head for fun*

You have no idea how i feel when i see this,

"when i left fer home,i was at my lowest,
and i couldn't hold back my tears and cried at lakeside mrt station .
so much fer acting strong in front of people,
and breaking down immediately when i'm alone ,boo me .
-___________________________-"

i can't stand it,but why am i pretending as if i'm alright with it ?
patience really is bigger than the ocean.

oh and cohen,thanks fer making me feel a little better just now , ^^" - Her

I seriously think Seth's would so much be a better boyfriend than I can be.
I know that something's affecting you but..guess what.. I always thought that you were fine and it was all part of my own thinking that you aren't alright.

I would say that I'm fucking pissed , yet disappointed and feeling veryy useless.

This is what's in my mind right now.

1) Why did I not force you to tell me what's happening.
2) Why can't i just move away if I know that I'm not the one.
3) Why is it that, I always get to know you only after things happens.
4) Should I just give up?
5) What's gonna happen in the future.

Well... After a good chat with the guys, let me tell you the answer.

1) Because I don't want to be over-controlling and I thought that you'll tell me everything as promised.

2) I don't know how to move away, even though I know that Seth will be there.

3) Because.. that's where you open up to me "indirectly" ?

4) I wouldn't unless You ask me to, or unless I know that Seth's really good for you.

5) I totally have no idea. Bliss i hope?

Call me a jealous bastard for all you want.
Cause yes I am jealous, but not because you hangout with your clique of guys.
But jealous of Seth's capability to be able to know what's happening around you and being able to console you.
While your GodDamn Idiotic Useless son-of-a-bitch boyfriend is just lepak-ing around with the guys.

No matter what I still don't believe in forcing out the truth.
Tell me when you want to.
I can't care less anymore.
After all, Like what you said.. "Fuck life"

I'm really tired right now, and I don't want to think anymore.
Maybe it really does work?
Not thinking and make decisions will just help you to lead a simple life.
Did you regret cranking your head and made a decision on the 14th of Febuary '09?

Well, I don't.
Cause I Love You that damn much.

goodnight.

Labels: just another lousy day